She was Isara, sometimes Isar. It was an intriguing name, like the Other to whom it belonged. I found her alluring and disturbing in equal measures; had no doubt that she had called me. I also knew that I could hear her summons so clearly because we were the same kind now. Like me, she was male at the moment. Unlike me, she had always been an Other.

 I sat stiffly upon the stone garden seat, still dazed by my journey to her stronghold. It had been like a waking dream as I followed a hum that seemed to fill the air and seep behind my eyes. I had no control over my body. My feet were like independent creatures obeying a force on the fringes of my consciousness. Any concern I had was secondary to obeying the urgency of her call and if I felt the slightest apprehension about wandering too far from Auriel and Adamnae's house, if I had wanted to turn back to the only place I knew as home in this city, I couldn't have.  

She didn't show herself right away and the waiting was difficult. There were too many questions in my head, chief among them was why Auriel seemed ignorant that women could make the change and the implications of this. It was obvious to me that there was much about themselves the Others didn't know. I couldn't help wondering, a thread of fear twining through my musing, what I would discover today about my new existence.

A young man, whose age it was impossible to guess, was suddenly on the path leading to my seat. She was dressed for war, I noticed and unlike Auriel, Adamnae and their band, this man's hair was short, cut longer on top and swept back from her forehead. The thick locks framed her face and she occasionally shook them back as she approached me, dark eyes unwavering as she sized me up. Isara, for I knew this young man was she, kept her thoughts from me. We stared at each other for a moment before she sat beside me with a little grunt.

"I'm glad you got here, Ishmaela."

"Ish, please."

She turned to me, smiling. I was suddenly too aware of her trim, well muscled body. There was a quick and supple deadliness about Isara, a wiry strength that promised speed and cunning in war. She was the sort of man that took one's breath and I couldn't help the thought that she would be equally overwhelming when she was female. If she sensed my thoughts --- I imagined it wouldn't take much to guess what effect she had on me --- she gave no sign. She merely nodded slightly.

"I suppose now that I'm one of you, I heard and responded to your call," I said, determined to control this encounter.

"Yes," she replied, in a tone that suggested amusement. "It's one of the things we share with our brothers. Auriel's told you about that...."

"Auriel has told me a lot of things," I replied tersely. I shifted, annoyed with myself for my reaction to Isara's casual mention of Auriel. "But I know there's much more that they ... that we ... don't know about ourselves. For instance, until Kipp and I changed, I don't think Auriel or Adamnae even considered that females *could* change."

Isara nodded and seemed pensive for a moment.

"That doesn't surprise me," she finally said. "Once someone has changed, what they were before doesn't really matter." She smiled thinly. "Interesting, though, that Auriel doesn't appear to have given the question much thought." 

I ignored her sardonic tone and resisted the urge to rise to his defence. There were other question on my mind and I was determined to see if Isara could answer them.

"This business of being a seer," I began. "As far as I know, males don't develop this ability." Though Auriel must have had an inkling about *that,* I mused.

"Hmm. No, it's something that seems to happen sometimes when females become Other. It's rare, though and kind of remarkable that it happened to both you and Kipp. It could be taken as a sign, I think."

I wondered briefly if Isara was joking. She had not lost that trace of a smile but her eyes were deadly serious. I was seized by the premonition that this was much more than simply a case of calling to a new Other. 

"It can be a bit disconcerting," I said. "I don't know if I will ever get used to it. What bothers me is the thought of becoming too dependent on it. Suppose no decision was ever made without consulting a seer?"

Isara only shrugged. "If a seer were available to me, I would certainly ask her advice on important matters but since I don't have one, I might have to ask you a thing or two."

 "And I'm sure I wouldn't be much help at all," I replied, hoping I masked my unease well. "What help could I possibly give you? Me who's been Other for only hours? You probably know a hell of a lot more than I do."

"You'll gain the experience and quickly, I think. Anyway, just because I happen to know a few things Auriel might not know doesn't mean I've got all the answers. I don't think anyone can say exactly how we began, for instance." She paused. "There's really only one thing I know for certain. We've got to win the war because the old order is dead."

A sense of danger danced over my skin like static electricity. I half expected her to jump up on our garden seat, a flicker of the insanity peculiar to zealots in her eyes. She sat beside me calmly, however, her gaze steady as she watched for what effect her words would have on me.

"Goes against all your better instincts, Ish?" she asked and though she hadn't raised it, there was steel in her voice. "You were made, not born. Those of us who were born Other can tell you the same story --- seeming 'normal' when we are children and then having your world blown apart when adolescence is reached. My father screamed at me that I was an unnatural freak when he threw me out of the house. Any idea what that feels like?"

"I think I might have some idea, yes," I told her, remembering Auriel's pain as he described how he left his mother's house.

She seemed to consider my response. I could see she doubted that I really had any understanding of what it had cost her to get to this point. However, she accepted what I said, aware that though I was sympathetic, I had not meant to patronise. 

"We make war beside our brothers against those who, given half a chance, would destroy us," Isara continued. "We have a common goal there. All of us understand that it's a question of our survival. I often wonder though: where are we finally going? Maybe in a direction I don't want to take. Maybe down a road I'm unwilling to lead my band. Then, I have to wonder what will happen if we refuse to follow Auriel and Adamnae's lead..." 

I didn't have an answer for her question or maybe it was more accurate to say, I hesitated to answer it. Somehow, I couldn't imagine Auriel savagely turning on his own kind. Was it wishful thinking on my part that both he and Adamnae would draw the line there?

"I don't think they force anyone to do anything," I carefully said. "Isar, they do listen to council. If I'm not mistaken, you've given them advice in the past. Do you really think they'd come in here and just blast you?"

"I don't know," she truthfully replied. "But I have wondered what would happen if I found myself in opposition to them." She leaned closer to me. "What do you think will happen when this war is over?"

I shrugged, my heart suddenly beating a little faster. If she noticed my discomfort, she didn't remark on it.

"There will be a lot of building to do, " I said flatly.

She nodded. "Of course and we'll be there to do our share. But I think it's more likely that before we can build, our brothers will turn on one another. Most likely there will be a war among us."

"We're not like men." I could not keep a tinge of hostility from my voice.

"No," she smiled, "Not men, nor women. All of us are both and neither, good and bad .... Adamnae and Auriel are strong. I wonder, though, if they are strong enough to lead us to peace."

The expression on my face must have been one of genuine disbelief. I didn't like what I was hearing and found myself thinking about Kipp, wondering how much she knew about all of this. Had she heard these arguments and drawn conclusions of her own?

"I think they are," I announced, "but that's just my opinion and obviously, you disagree."

 "No, it isn't that I disagree per se," she replied. "But I am hoping that now you are Other, perhaps you'll be able to see some things you couldn't before."

"What are you expecting from me? You can't really think I'm going to take sides here and now, based on a few minutes of conversation."

"I'm just asking that you consider what I'm saying. You will be strong, Ish. We all know this. You and Kipp together will be quite formidable."

She stood and I got a good look at her long, lean, battle-hardened body. An impish grin stole across her face and she ran her hand over my newly shaved head.

"Like the hair cut. Walk a ways with me."

As we walked, I reached tentatively for her thoughts, wondering if she would permit it, wondering if I'd be violently repelled. Isara was shielding effectively however. She tensed and threw me a challenging look. If I wanted information from the mind touch, I'd have to push much harder. That I was unwilling to do and Isara relaxed when I withdrew.  I was reeling from Isara's threats of strife amongst us and the feeling that I walked along the edge of a precipice was strong, my balance maintained only through my bond to Auriel. She was silent beside me, head bent now as we set a leisurely pace towards a commanding white building just glimpsed through the garden's riot of foliage. What little she had said to me whirled in my brain and I found myself wanting to know more about whatever she might be planning.

"So if Auriel and Adamnae take a direction you don't approve of, what exactly do you plan to do?" I asked.

She looked quickly at me, her eyes narrowing. "No beating around the bush, I see."

"I haven't the time for niceties and am afraid I'd make a crap spy. You tell me things you obviously want me to know..."

"You know I want more than that."

"Yeah," I tried to sound dismissive. "So, if Adamnae and Auriel cannot lead us to peace --- or you think they can't --- do you think you can?"

Her pace slackened, her warrior's body suddenly wound tightly as if to strike out. "I'm waiting, Ish. I'm waiting and observing. If things do not go the way I think they should, we'll make our move."

I nodded. "You realise I'll tell all of this to Auriel."

"I would be surprised if you didn't." She looped a strong arm through mine and picked up the pace once again. "We aren't on different sides, you know. There may not even be a need for sides but if there is, I'm going to make certain the right one wins."

I laughed, "Yours, of course."

"Of course!"

The building we approached was three stories high. On the ground floor, a series of tall French doors opened onto the lawn we now crossed. Inside, purposeful but unhurried activity was apparent, members of Isara's band busy with the business of the upkeep of their home and headquarters, and with the business of war. I watched them, Isara's words on my mind, and complicated emotions took hold of me all at once, leaving me a little dazed by how unlikely this entire course of events was --- that I should ever have met Auriel, become Other; that I should find myself in this situation at all.
 
A young man jumped through the door before us and jogged across the grass to Isara. I guessed him to be about 19. He was slight with fine, light brown hair that fell to his shoulders. His eyes shone with a light I knew was only for the man beside me and once he was close enough, he left the ground in a spectacular leap into Isara's open arms. I thought the impact would have sent them both flying but she hugged him fiercely, feet planted firmly in the well kept grass.

They exchanged quick, playful kisses and I suddenly found myself thinking of Tonio and how he looked that fateful night we met at the Club. This young man had that same look and I knew he was on his way to becoming Other. I was struck then by the absurdity of it all --- that Auriel could make me, that Isara could make him and yet above us all loomed the threat of warfare that would see Other pitched against Other. 

I watched as the playful kisses became something more; mouths lingering, fingers beginning to explore, the boy's delicate hands slipping inside Isara's vest stroking gently. She caught them before too long and gave him a look that said later, then smiled at me. He followed her gaze. I watched the lust clear from his eyes, replaced by a frank intelligence that appraised me quickly. I returned the stare.

"Meet Kiran," Isara said. "Kiran, this is Ish."

I'm not sure what I expected, if my name had somehow become infamous. I half expected to see recognition flash across his face followed by a nod of understanding. As it was, he gave no sign that he knew who I was and I was strangely relieved. We continued across the grass, Isara with an arm draped loosely around Kiran's shoulders. I wondered that she could make such a casual gesture so possessive and erotic.

We crossed the threshold and she said to me, "Want to see the latest battle plans?"

She laughed at my confusion. "Bet Auriel's never included you on such session before. Am I right?"

"Not sure I was ever that interested, really," I muttered, hoping Isara would not see my discomfort as I remembered my dreams. 

She responded with a shrug and led us out into a wide hallway. Gleaming white walls were bare and the wood floor highly polished. At the far end of the hall was a wide staircase that curved and disappeared on its way to the floors above. Isara led us to double doors, didn't pause as she pushed one side open. Kiran followed her in then headed for a leather sofa on one side of the room. With a little grin at me, he arranged himself across it. I dragged my attention away from his preening and took in my surroundings.

The room was a library. Shelves that stretched from floor to ceiling were built into the walls. Across the room before me was a large desk and I could see that the papers strewn across it were maps. A familiar sight by now. Also familiar was the group of Others gathered around the desk --- wearing rough leather and barely acknowledging Isara as she approached them. Some sported hair cuts like hers. Others had the flowing hair I'd come to associate with Auriel and most of the members of his bands. Not completely sure how I knew, I was certain that before me stood a joint council of war, brothers and sisters. I was curious about how many were born Other and how many had been made.

*Adamnae will be pleased with this, Isar,* I suddenly heard in my head. The voice continued, *I think it's superior to what we did last time.*

Curiosity got the better of me. How exactly did they wage war? But I knew how and could not suppress a shudder. I had seen the destruction we were capable of in my dreams and those dreams were still vivid.  I approached the desk and those around it parted, their movement touching something in my memory. Without trying, I could feel the emotions around me, an expectation, curiosity from some and from the Other who had addressed Isara, an emotional silence that spoke volumes. Here was someone who did not give her trust easily.

It was not easy to interpret the plans and maps before me. I was about to turn to Isar for help in deciphering the codes and symbols but before I could, a familiar feeling swept over me. I wanted to grab the edge of the desk to steady myself but it was no longer there. Reality rippled and the library seemed to float past me like leaves and twigs caught in a rushing brook. Fighting vertigo and trying to control my fear, I let the vision take me.

Grey murk greeted me, as if an unseen sun shone from some indeterminate place. Shapes formed out of the gloom slowly. They materialised from the mists that never cleared but only parted momentarily before closing in again. The fog couldn't hide the signs of great, fierce battles. The buildings leaned, sad defeated things that defied gravity. It was impossible that they were still standing. Too many times I had seen this same thing in nightmares that stayed with me for days. This scene, though, was no dream. Somewhere in time, this place existed and the war between men and Others had left these terminal wounds. Roads and pavements were impossible to navigate but I moved forward, seeking the reason I'd been drawn here. I passed over the ruins on a supernatural wind and the empty, decaying monuments to a defeated civilisation crumbled to dust as I flew by.  I couldn't sense any sign of life and my passing completed the violent process begun sometime in the recent past. 

The broken skeleton of the town was soon behind me. Cracked road became empty highway, warping under the unseen sun. Small towns, solitary houses and farms, all of them deserted ruins, fell into oblivion as I rushed on. If I stopped and stared long enough, I would see the process unfold before me, wood, steel, stone trickling steadily to dust; vegetation withering, curling and falling to ash. But I sped forward, anxious to catch the storm that left this chaos. I followed the long wide, dead straight road, used now to the absence of life. Then, below me the highway became flat plains, empty except for a brown carpet of dry, dead grass. The suspicion that I'd been somehow trap in someone's particularly gruesome version of hell nagged at me, fear growing with each passing mile. When I felt the unmistakable psychic presence of Others, relief mingled with trepidation. I warned myself that answers were never all or what we expect them to be, especially in the dreamscape. But this was no dream and what I was about to discover was so shocking, it nearly left me powerless.

Even moving as I was, making use of that space between worlds, sounds of fierce fighting reached me. What I could hear was a battle to the death, the firing of weapons, the clang and zing of steel against steel and the screams of triumph, of agony and of the dying. Laced through it all on a register only some of the participants here could hear or feel, was the sinister thrum of dark magic used accurately against the Others. I watched them fall, one by one and the man each faced did not hesitate to make certain the hated, feared enemy was truly dead. Slaughter --- and it was us being slaughtered. The scene stole my voice and power. I watched in growing horror, stomach clenched and despairing sickness spreading through me with the realisation that our enemies had figured it out. They had a shaman and that shaman's magic was as strong as any I'd seen the Others work.

If this shaman happened to noticed me, I'd be in unimaginable danger. But this was why I was here: to find out who threatened us with annihilation. A part of me didn't want to search for him, didn't want to expose myself to whatever darkness he could hurl at me. Nevertheless, I steeled myself to begin. I struggled to put my dying brothers out of my mind and futilely sought a kernel of calm. Again and again, my concentration was drawn to the battle. Was Auriel down there amongst the fallen? Adamnae? Remir and Grey? I suddenly felt inadequate to this task. Ridiculous that I found myself here with nothing to prepare me, an Other , a *Seer* for scant hours before this trial by fire. What finally broke my panic was the realisation that this battle had not happened yet. There was still time to change the course of events. The immobilising fear fell away from me immediately and I soared upwards, seeking the source of the dark power as I went.

I didn't think he occupied the same space as the brutal battle. Even as the thought occurred to me, the scene below was fading, the dead and those still locked in mortal struggle becoming blurred as if a heavy fog were settling about them. Then, they were gone.

I found myself in a place where light fell flat and grey from no apparent source. There was nothing here, no objects by which to orient myself. I began to wonder how I'd gotten here, was starting to focus my attention on returning to that world of battle when something grabbed me and dragged me forward. Gaining speed all the time, too much for me to control, I feel deeper into the grey nothingness. I saw myself hit something solid, a wall or hard unforgiving earth, and resisted the urge to scream.

As suddenly as the grey void had enveloped me, it expelled me violently, like something distasteful, from its cosmic mouth. When I'd recovered my wits, I discovered that I was in a tropical paradise, listening to water running somewhere unseen, its familiar rush and gurgle a soothing sound after the horror of that place of death. Surrounded by green, the brilliant reds and indigo of jungle flowers and shrubs I was tempted to relax, to lose myself in the smell of the fertile earth and the promises of all the life around me. Could I take physical form here? It was tempting to try. Already, I could smell the jungle's perfume, hear the cries of birds and animals I couldn't identify. I wanted to feel this ground under my feet, taste the air and feel the tangle of greenery slide against my skin. Something nagged at me, however --- something I had to do, had to remember.

*But you belong here,* I heard a gentle voice coaxing. *You _want_ to stay!*

Above me, peering through the dense lacework of green, were two huge eyes, like full moons low on a horizon and yellow with a sun's fading light. Unblinking and inhuman, they watched me, malice streaming from them and threatening to destroy not only me but the alluring garden too. The sight was enough to shatter the spell of forgetfulness and no matter how hard I concentrated, I could not see anymore of him. The eyes, however, took on a shade of black amusement.

*You're no match for me. Lay down now and die for you should never have been born.*

The words were spoken with the confidence of someone sure of his powers and certain of success. My feet struck earth and in the next breath, I found myself on the floor of the jungle looking up to a sky choked with branches. As I watched, the large leaves grew impossibly larger until all light was blocked. Ropy vines sprouted around me snaking around my wrists and ankles and I watched them grow quickly to strap down my arms and legs. The vines entwining my chest, creeping towards my neck, spurred me to desperate action. I heaved myself towards the sky with every particle of my being focused and screamed in terror and disbelief when I couldn't escape my living prison.

As the living rope reached my neck and began to choke me, the vines around my body began to pull me into the earth. Like being swallowed into quicksand or sinking into mud, I was pulled down. I saw the plants, flowers and trees shift to grow over me, to sink roots through me. A second before there was only darkness, twin bolts of dazzling white lightning explode this hell, making the oppressive foliage dance eerily. I closed my eyes and prepared to become one with the jungle. 
<><><><><>

I sat bolt upright and screamed. I was being held tightly, my arms immobile at my sides and I screamed until my throat was raw and the only sounds I could make were terrified whimpers. Then I began to fight against the bindings holding me, trying to claw my way out of the grave.

I was released instantly. A room took shape around me and I realised I was back in Isara's study, stretched out on her sofa. Kneeling beside me, his hair framing his face and flowing over his shoulders, was Auriel. The worry in his eyes changed instantly to relief when I turned to him, obviously recognising him. He gathered me in his arms and I went willingly, squeezing my eyes shut so my tears wouldn't escape.

*We've got trouble,* I told him unnecessarily.

Only then did I notice Kipp, Adamnae and Remir. Greythorn's absence was conspicuous.

Isara sat beside me. I felt Auriel stiffen in my arms. If Isar felt anything, she did not respond.

*Had to call out the heavy guns,* I heard her in my head. I could also hear the concern she tried to cover with her joking. *What did you see?*

Kipp came forward then. "Don't you think this can wait? Look at her! We're damn lucky we got her back..."

Auriel seemed to ignore them both. He stroked my arms gently as if afraid I might disappear at any moment. The hysterical thought that I could do just that flashed through my head and I giggled. Kipp inhaled sharply. Auriel started radiating calm. The effect on all of us was immediate.

"Indeed," he murmured, though he kept his eyes on me as he acknowledged Kipp's remark. "And it took all four of us to do it. Tell us what you saw, Ish."

I swung my feet to the floor and Auriel moved to the other side of me. Kipp and Adamnae stood close together, nearly one being on the fringes of my consciousness and Remir was sitting cross legged on the floor not far from Adamnae. The expectation filled the study. The council of war had apparently been disbanded: it was only us in the room. I took Auriel's hands in mine as I wondered just how much of the vision they wanted or needed to know. Then I wondered if what I had seen applied to the battle they were about to wage or to some battle in the future. 

*Just tell us the bottom line, Ishmaela,* Kipp prompted. I nodded slowly.

"Well, the bottom line is this," I began. "Men have magic now. Looks like they've figured it out. They have a Shaman and he's powerful. I don't know how you all dragged me back here but I thought I was dead."

Auriel nodded. "Yes. It makes sense...."

"Why?!" I looked at him sharply. "I never thought it was possible! I never thought they'd *really* believe it. It goes against everything every rational person's been taught...."

"Whether or not they believe in magic seems beside the point to me," I heard Remir mutter. "What do we do now? How do we fight this Shaman...."

Their attention was on me again. I sighed. 

"I was looking at the current battle plans when the vision took me. But I don't think that necessarily means what I saw was the coming battle. I'll bet this shaman can call us, make us see what he wants us to see..."

Adamnae and Auriel exchanged looks. I glanced Kipp's way for support. Fear began to grow in my belly and snake through my body. I shuddered and Auriel put an arm around me.

"Maybe. Grey has perfected the art of walking in dreams. Perhaps this shaman is just as good at it. Maybe he can control your visions. Maybe not." Auriel paused. "Seems to me if he was so powerful, none of us would be sitting here now. We did manage to bring you home, Ish."

"We need to know who he is," Kipp suddenly said. "We need to find him and destroy him."

"He'll have apprentices," I was shocked to hear myself say. I didn't know how I knew this, only that it was true. "They must be destroyed as well."

"This will take time," Isara spoke with some impatience. "What the hell do we do in the meantime?"

"Carry on," Adamnae answered sharply. "We know he's out there now. We are not unprepared nor are we helpless. What's the matter with you all?! We have been using our magic for a long time now! We built this city with it! How can one shaman stand against us if we are prepared and know he's there?"

"And if he's not alone?" Isara demanded. "Forgive me, Adamnae, but I think you're rushing into something without all the information. Ish has warned us but we don't know that she saw everything there was to see in her vision."

*Enough,* Auriel commanded. Adamnae glowered at him but did not respond to Isara.

I felt suddenly drained. I knew I had to sleep. I felt time slipping away from us, every passing second bringing us closer to destruction. But I had been to hell and back this afternoon and everything in me cried out for the oblivion of sleep. I leaned against Auriel with a small sigh.

"Let's get you home," he murmured against my ear, well aware of my exhaustion.

"Don't be ridiculous, Auriel," Isar's voice came to me from a great distance. "You all are welcomed to stay here for now. Ishmaela is in no condition to travel."

I was not too far gone to feel the unspoken completion of her statement and wondered if Auriel felt it too. She knew that he would not leave me alone in her stronghold.

We were settled in bed, his long, lithe form naked and pressed up behind me. Auriel nuzzled my ear and reached around me to fondle my cock. I laughed softly as I dozed, appreciating his stroking but too tired to respond. 

"I know what you're thinking and I forbid it," he murmured.

"I know you do," I muttered. "But it doesn't make a difference, Rie. I'll be travelling anyway. It makes sense that I should seek him out."

I could feel his heartbeat against my back, his hardness against my rump. The terror for me in his heart. Just before I fell into much needed sleep I told him, "When I find him, I'll call you."

I awoke sometime later. Morning light filled our bedroom and I was amazed that I had slept so long. Auriel was still asleep beside me and the sight filled me with desire. I was reluctant to wake him though, fearing that he would want to continue our disagreement. I lay there watching him, my thoughts in turmoil. I realised I should be leaving soon. I knew the longer I delayed, the more difficult it would be. It was too tempting to give in to the illusion of safety promised by Auriel's arms. No one, nowhere would be safe unless this magician was stopped.

Destroyed, I reminded myself. Start now to call things by their real name, Ish.

I looked at Auriel asleep beside me. His hair was a tangled mane upon the pillow, his composed face nearly as pale as the sheets. He appeared peaceful in sleep as if he didn't have a care in the world. Looking at him, watching as his chest rose and fell with a gentle rhythm, it was easy to forget the danger looming over us.

I bent over him to kiss him, wanting to explore his mouth with long, wet kisses, and the scent of him, warm from our bed, washed over me. I had begun to grind against him slowly when there was a knock at the door. As Auriel stirred and reached for me, I sent discouraging thoughts towards the door.

*Screw Auriel later, Ishmaela! Let me in.*

Kipp. And from the sounds of her not to be deterred. Auriel laughed softly and rolled over to fall back to sleep. With a sigh, I rose from our bed. This had better be good, I thought.

Near the window, through which the early morning sunlight glittered, were two large, comfortable chairs. Kipp made her way to them after giving me a knowing smile. Desperate as I was for Auriel, I had to admit it was good to see her. Comforting to be alone with her after all that had happened in such a mind boggling short space of time. I followed her and we settled ourselves in the early morning sun.

*When will you leave?* she asked.

I shrugged. Soon. It had to be soon or I was afraid it wouldn't be at all. No protracted goodbyes. I could not give myself time to think about what I was about to do. Then, with amusement that barely concealed my agitation, I told Kipp that Auriel was against my trip. 

She did not reply at once. Kipp leaned back in the chair and stared out the window. Our view was of Isar's well kept garden. I could almost touch Kipp's emotions, how the quiet of the early morning rolled over her, promising a calm I knew she didn't feel. Everything in the garden, grass, flowers, the air itself scintillated with the magic that was available to anyone on any bright and clear morning. I waited and was grateful for this moment of calm; my lover asleep not far from me, my best friend beside me offering silent, strong support. I knew then why she had come. 

*It's out of the question, Kipp,* I told her. *You can't abandon Adamnae. If you did...*

*I know what would happen and I know I can't do it. But I also know that it's insanity to let you go off on your own. You're going to try to find him and he knows who you are. You're inexperienced...*

"Which might work in my favour," I quietly told her. "Look. Everyone seems to think I'm off on some suicide mission. I'm just going to go find my kids. If I happen to come across anything unusual, so much the better. I don't want to die, thanks. Had a taste of what it might be like in that damn jungle --- an experience I'm not exactly anxious to repeat."

"I'd feel better if you had a companion. Someone more experienced," she muttered.

"That leaves you out, Sweetie," I laughed.

She threw me a look that plainly asked how I could joke at a time like this. I leaned forward and placed my hands on her knees, hoping to soothe her as she pondered the dilemma that could have only one solution no matter how distressed it made her feel. An odd feeling coursed through me when her grey eyes met mine; an exchange of knowledge, promises made. She would take care of the ones we loved. I would take care but I would also find this dark wizard and he would be destroyed.

*One thing, Ishmaela. Keep out of Greythorn's way.*

I threw myself back into my chair, tired of hearing about the threat to me Greythorn represented. I wanted to reassure Kipp. I searched for just the right words that would convince her I had no intentions of going anywhere near Grey. She shook her head.

*I mean it. If you sense him near, give him a wide berth. Don't try to make contact.*

Would he stalk me even now? Faced with the only real threat from our enemies since this struggle began? I couldn't believe it and wanted to make the argument that it wasn't a very sensible course at the moment, to say the least! But Greythorn was not thinking very sensibly, if at all, right now.

Kipp continued, *Remember what Auriel said about Grey. I think Greythorn might go after this guy himself and he might not be too particular about who's around when he finds him. Then again, he's just as likely to....*

*I _know_ Kipp. Believe me. I talked to him in his room. I saw the state he's in. No need to go on about it.* I watched her carefully as I continued. *His absence yesterday was so.... noticeable. Auriel and Adamnae aren't complete without him...*

If she was disturbed by my observation, Kipp hid it well. *We didn't need him. It didn't seem a good idea to drag him into something the rest of us could handle on our own.*

Auriel didn't want him anywhere near that situation yesterday, I realised. I was suddenly cold, suddenly desperately needed Auriel's arms around me. Kipp, I'm sure, read my thoughts. She stood and opened her arms. I fell into them without hesitation, acutely aware of the changes that being Other had brought to her body. I found myself missing the feel of her soft, round woman's body, the feel and comfort that was Kipp to me. Her embrace tightened and in the next moment, the joys and pleasures, the mystery of being Other engulfed me.

"We've been through too much together," Kipp whispered into my ear. "I couldn't go on without you, Ishmaela."

"You won't have to. I promise. But there's one thing I've got to know, Kipp." I paused, wondering if she could guess what I would say next. "Did you know about Isara? Did you know what we'd become?"

She pulled away from me and looked into my face. A minute later, she'd released me. The look Kipp gave me was one I'd seldom seen before, like she was weighing up what she would and wouldn't tell me. My heart skipped a beat.

"Yeah," she finally admitted. "I knew."

I was suddenly aware of Auriel, supposedly asleep in the bed. He had not stirred during our conversation. I half expected him to sit bolt upright now and demand an explanation. But he didn't move and I could only think that Kipp had her reasons for keeping her change secret.

"Did you know what Isara was planning?" I tried to keep accusation out of my tone of voice.

She shook her head. "She's not planning anything yet! Think, Ishmaela. If I'd gone to Adamnae with half the truth, with stories and hearsay, how do you think he'd react? For now, we're all on the same side and I think Adamnae and Auriel need all the help they can get at the moment. It wouldn't have exactly furthered our cause if Adamnae had blasted Isara and her clique to hell. Not only would that diminish our numbers but how would others react to an attack like that?"

"Auriel would not have let him."

"Hmm. Like he keeps Greythorn under control, I suppose."

"That's different and you know it! Lourdes was a real threat to him. Isara has the potential to be as well."

"At the moment, that's all she is. A potential threat. The minute she's a real one, she's history."

I shook my head. *I'm not sure we should be in a position of deciding what is and isn't good for Adamnae and Auriel to know.*

Kipp shrugged, a movement that said so much. *You might be right. But I'm learning quickly, Ishmaela and one thing I know. If you cannot predict what Adamnae might do, if the situation is not immediately pressing, best to do nothing. It doesn't take much for him to see plots and conspiracies everywhere.*

*You could have told Auriel.*

Kipp laughed. *No, I couldn't. Since I decided not to tell Adamnae for the moment, I couldn't tell anyone. I really didn't expect you to change so soon. I didn't think you'd ever give in to him....*

I looked away and Kipp laughed softly.

*Didn't exactly give in, huh?* She sent my way. *Well, I always could see a darkness in him.... Anyway, Others aren't quite what we thought they were and we both know there's probably a lot more to discover about ourselves.*

"I just hope that one of those discoveries isn't civil war," I said.

*So do I.*

Kipp and I whirled towards the bed. Auriel was a vision of wrath, dark eyes flashing, his black hair falling about him a stark contrast to his paleness. I was motionless, my heart pounding and the only thing I could think was, why hadn't we had this conversation in Isar's garden? But beside me, Kipp stood easy and I saw she regarded Auriel with a hint of amusement.

"Not as asleep as we thought, hmmm?" she said.

I winced at Kipp's words, imagining the frenzy she hoped to provoke with them but Auriel slowly smiled. I couldn't decide if it was with humour or with thoughts of the slow torture he thought Kipp deserved at the moment.

"You should have told me," he said softly. "We would have thought of a way to tell Adamnae."

Kipp looked pensive for a moment. I wondered if she was deceived by Auriel's soft tone. But she was not afraid of him, unlike the rest of us. The only other person I knew could face up to Auriel was Adamnae.

Kipp shook her head. "No, Rie. He would have seen it as betrayal on my part. And let's face it. He's the one person in the world who actually scares you. I had the situation under control. You've got to learn to trust me."

"This sort of behaviour hardly inspires trust," he retorted.

"I'm asking that you trust me to do what's right for us all --- not to do what you think I should ..."

"Have you *seen* something, Seer?!" he suddenly demanded, all pretence of reasonableness gone. "Tell me why I should trust you to do anything!"

"Auriel!" I gasped. But Kipp placed a hand on my arm. I'd seen her square up to him before, tell him things no one else dared. She was calm beside me, even looked as if she had expected this outburst from him. I bit my lower lip.

"I've seen a lot of things," she admitted. "Nothing as clear as a war among us. And I have not seen Isara at all. Look, Auriel. If it hadn't been Isar, it could easily have been someone else. What's to say any disgruntled Other, who thinks he's strong enough, won't plot against you too?"

"You know it's more than that," he said.

Kipp nodded. "Yes. Suddenly, females can be Other as well --- something you didn't think could happen. Was Ish's change a surprise to you?"

He shrugged. "Most of my lovers have been male, Kipp. I never thought about what would happen to a female. And in war, no questions are asked. Some of us prefer to be female.... I'm female as easily as I am male. That's who I am. Who would think to ask about such a thing?"

"Then why ask now? You were male before your change: Isar was female. Now you are both Other. As I see it, the only reason for concern is whether or not her bands will eventually stand against us. Right now, we can't answer that question. Right now she fights beside us and her aides are as good as any of ours."

*Where do your loyalties lay, Kipp?*

Kipp didn't answer him. Instead, she crossed the room and sat next to him on the edge of the bed. Auriel watched her with interest and I held my breath. Kipp touched his hair, softly, as if it were something she had always wanted to do. She was so close to him, a shift of millimetres would have brought them to a kiss. But she did not close the distance between them. Instead, she looked into his eyes.

*Even if my love of Ishmaela wasn't enough, just what do you think Adamnae would do to me if I let any harm come to you?*

*Do you love him?*

She smiled. *You have to ask?*

I chuckled softly as I made my way to the other side of the bed. In her reply to Auriel, I could recognise the old Kipp. I crawled next to him and placed my hand on top of his.

Auriel spoke, "No, I don't suppose I do. Have you told him? Your change must have been a shock."

Kipp turned away then stood up. Auriel watched her as if any inattentive move on her part would tell him what was truly on her mind. I thought I saw a moment of indecision but it flashed by so quickly and I doubted that Auriel, who didn't know Kipp like I did, saw it.

"My change didn't seem to affect him like I thought it might. I don't have an answer for you, Auriel. It was like he knew some things but didn't have the entire picture. Somehow he knew I'd become a seer. As for becoming Other," Kipp shrugged. "Who really knows what goes on in Adamnae's head? Maybe he knew, maybe he didn't but it didn't seem to be a big deal to him. Isar believes that only Others who were born female have the gift. I'm not so sure. Maybe being a little crazy has given Adamnae a bit of the gift as well...

"I had to tell him about Isara before I really wanted to. Events overtook me. Fortunately, Isara has a string of successful battles to her credit. At first I don't think Adamnae believed what I was telling him!" Kipp laughed. "I convinced him that confrontation would not be helpful right now. There's a battle to be planned, things to be reviewed. He's decided to do nothing for now.  He also wants Greythorn to come here."

Auriel sat quite still. I realised I was hardly breathing as I watched him. I could guess what he was thinking and dreaded his reaction. I wondered if there'd be a shouting match later between Adamnae and him. Carefully I reached for his thoughts and tried to soothe the turmoil I sensed was building. 

"I'll call him," he finally said.

Kipp turned towards the door but before she left, she turned back to him and said, "Don't get paranoid, Auriel. You know Adamnae. It probably amused him that you'd eventually make Ishmaela Other. I wouldn't even be surprised if he knew that she would have the gift too. Think of it as payback for that little stunt you pulled our very first night in the club."

 He smiled then, a small smile but with genuine amusement. I kissed his hair and left his side to step into the hallway with Kipp. 

"You always have to do things the difficult way, don't you?" I said. I wasn't sure if I was angry or amused. "For a moment there, he was mad enough to blast you to dust."

"But he didn't. He wouldn't. He needs me to tell him the truth --- which should be your job by the way."

I laughed. "Even when my version of the truth is more or less similar to his? I'm still not convinced this is the end of it, Kipp."

"Maybe not. Adamnae and Auriel can't really look at Others in the same way anymore. The mystery has deepened, been made complete in a way, I think. It's just going to take us all a little time to get used to the idea."

"I suspect seeing Isar in battle would get me used to the idea pretty damn quickly," I mused and remembered my first reaction to the proud, determined warrior.

"Hmm. Well, don't get used to any *other* ideas," Kipp briskly said. "A jealous Auriel is *not* something I want to think about. Besides, I've got first dibs after him. Remember?"

She grabbed me in a tight embrace, then kissed me long and hard. Suddenly serious, she murmured, "Watch yourself out there."

I will. The promise translated from my heart, through my body as she held me a second longer. Then, she headed down the hall without looking back. From the bedroom, I felt Auriel's insistent call. He was female and waiting for me and the morning had just begun.
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It was difficult to leave him when I felt his uncertainty. However, I wanted to be on my way by the time Greythorn arrived. I knew the council of war would go better if I was not there to distract them. It was a release that Greythorn needed now and it was a way for Auriel to get close to his lieutenant without reminding him of what he had lost. It struck me from the moment I first saw him, how attentive to Auriel Greythorn was. Now I wondered if they would end up bed partners. I could contemplate Auriel's liaison with Adamnae but didn't want to think too much about the possibility of Greythorn and him sharing a bed. Much easier to see them planning war, along with our brothers and sisters, doing everything they could to ensure success and I too had a part to play towards this end....

I was alone again. This solitude, however, was not like any I'd experienced before. I knew Auriel was just a soft call away. He tried to look so unconcerned when we finally said good bye. It wasn't really good bye, he let me know. We could be together any time we liked. I'd be back in our City soon enough, completing our circle of power. We avoided any thought or mention of the danger, trying to ignore the possibility that there could be a different ending to this adventure of mine.

My hair was growing back. I decided to let it. I would need some camouflage out there in the world of men. A man with longish hair was one thing; a bald woman was quite another. I laughed softly. Male, female, which was I? Only Ish, sometimes Ishmaela. I adjusted my Fedora and put my feet upon the road.
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